Friday, November 24, 2017

A Thumotic Perspective on Delayed Development to Adulthood, Part 4

Mature Ways

Mature ways of getting what you need when you’re unable to sustain your life are assertive. Developing your mature, assertive ways of getting what you need include but aren’t limited to-

·      Taking good care of your spirit

o   Practice the basic spirit-mindfulness exercises
o   Practice accepting fully your spirit’s emotional responses
o   Grieve what delayed your development
o   Let your life-affirming emotions drive you toward maturity

·      Taking good care of your body

o   Consume healthy food and drink
§  Learn to grocery shop
§  Learn how to prepare healthy meals
o   Breathe fresh air
o   Exercise
o   Rest
o   Get sound sleep

·      Engaging your mind to-

o   Understand what delayed your development
o   Understand the difference between “I can’t” and “I won’t”
o   Accepting yourself and your life as they are right now
o   Positive self-talk
o   Understand the difference between mind-based and reality-based emotional responses
o   Be aware of the life-affirming desires of your heart
o   Set goals and making a plan to attain them

·      Developing your social skills

o   Let go of blaming others
o   Become responsible for your life
§  HOW=Honest, Open, Willing
§  Use “I” statements, assertive speech
§  Increase what you do for yourself, within your abilities
§  Access community agencies for assistance with-
·      Finances
·      Food
·      Housing
·      Healthcare
·      Childcare
·      Employment
o   Job training
o   Job application, resume
o   Job interview skills
·      Transportation

o   Become responsible to others

§  Identify the people in your circle of support
§  Ask for help from others for you cannot do for yourself
§  Express sincere gratitude for help received
o   Develop your verbal communication skills
o   Develop your written communication skills
o   Get additional training/education/certification to increase pay
o   Pay it forward, give others a hand up when you’re able to do so


Developing mature, assertive ways of getting what you need are constructive. They help you mature, become an adult, and sustain your own life. They calm the emotional responses of your spirit. They also strengthen your relationships with others.

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